Starbucks in Weybridge. Weird place. It's about 100 feet deep but only about 10 feet wide, so you feel like you're having coffee in a corridor.
It's a sign!
Oh British Gas, I cannot proclaim you as my Valentine. How many times in the last week have you thwarted me? Let me count the days.
You are an unfaithful utility, leaving me pining for your company. I peer out of my window, in the manner of Meryl Streep on the Cobb at Lyme Regis. Longingly I wait for your engineer to call, but I am left bereft and forgotten, like a discarded lover from your indiscreet past.
So, British Gas, you will not be receiving bouquets of red roses from me, just another email to your complaints department.
I watched "My Big Fat Greek Wedding" on Channel 4, and I became quite emotional.
I suspect I really do require therapy.
P and I took my parents out to dinner, and then on to the theatre.
It was supposed to be a comedy, but if it was, it was thin on laughter.
Ah! British Gas! What a relationship we are having! I telephone you to find out the whereabouts of your 'engineer'. You do not call me back, nor does the 'engineer' arrive.
We have had two days of a one-way relationship. At 5.45pm, your duty manager told me he admired my patience.
I am like a Buddhist customer, watching the flowers grow, as I await your pleasure.
While I'm waiting for the British Gas bloke to turn up, I may turn my mind to calculating how many days I have spent, in the last ten years, sitting about waiting for a British Gas bloke to turn up.